DAY ONE: This week's film festivities are initiated with an outstanding double feature of two classic Monogram favorites, neither of which had ever been seen before by your Balcony Webmaster, no reflection, certainly, on the high esteem in which he personally views Bela Lugosi and his skill at entertaining audiences as no other Monogram star could.

Our first film was directed by Joseph Lewis and released on April 25, 1941 as Lugosi's first official Monogram offering for Sam Katzman's Banner Productions. As our passion play opens, Lugosi is mourning the death of his beloved wife, whom he still talks to, kibbutzes with, and sits across from at the dinner table (conversing with an empty chair). Lugosi, by the way, is the only actor in the world who can say, "You're more beautiful than EVER this evening" and make it sound scary. I mean, another actor saying, "I'm going to wait until you're asleep and then bludgeon you to death with this iron crowbar" isn't nearly as frightening as Bela hissing words of love. In any case, his mourning is for naught, because it turns out Mrs. Lugosi is still alive, and living in a secret room under the barn. It appears she's gone off her nut, and so the gardener keeps her there as a pet or something. She roams around the estate in the darkness, though, and Bela sees her through his bedroom window and naturally, that triggers a homicidal rage in him (well, ya can't blame the guy) and he stumbles around the house in a trance and begins killing off his household servants, one after another. I think the whole thing is a ploy to keep from withholding Social Security, but you know how cynical *I* am. He smothers his victims with his smoking jacket, apparently. It looks kind of silly when you see it.

Favorite dialog -- Black manservant: "Do I look pale to you?"

Second favorite dialog -- Police detective: "Strangled?!? Well, HERE we GO again!"

Favorite Bela dialog -- "Apple pie! My, dat VILL be a TREAT!"

Second favorite Bela dialog -- "MURDER!?! I can't IMAGINE who vould do a t'ink like DAT!"

Frankly, even for a Monogram picture with Bela Lugosi in it, this is pretty stupid.

Our night(mare)cap was directed by Wallace Fox, released October 30, 1942, and is a film we've never heard anything good about. So we were quite surprised, actually, to discover that it's actual everything we expect in a Monogram film (no, no, no, we meant that as a compliment)... 61 minutes worth of good, breezy B-movie entertainment.

Okay, try 'n' follow this... Bela is a Poindexter-looking college professor by day, happily married (to a babe!) and the owner of a singing parakeet. By night, though, he runs the Bowery Family Mission, which dispenses soup to transients and drunks, but which is ACTUALLY just a front for Lugosi's criminal activities, which consists of selecting gang members from the Mission customers, using them to help him commit crimes, and then murdering them and burying their corpses in his secret basement, which is next to his secret hideout, which is down the stairs from his secret closet, which you get to through his secret doorway, which is off the side wall in his secret office.

Favorite dialog -- police sergeant (who looks just like Fred Mertz, incidentally): "I can feel the HOT BREATH of the outraged public on my neck!"

Second fave dialog, tailor Bernard Gorcey after a young man tells that he wants to try on the suit in the window: "You can try it on, but in the dressing room, not in the window."

Favorite Bela dialog, as he describes the Mission -- "Here, you vill find FOOD for your BODY ass vell ass COMFORT for yourrrr TROUBLED mind!"

Besides the aforementioned cameo by good ol' "Louie Dumbrowsky" himself, this one's got Dave O'Brien as the cop investing the murders in the Bowery, Tom Neal as a homicidal lunatic who becomes a gunman for Lugosi, and -- oh yeah, can't forget these guys -- a mad doctor who turns some of Lugosi's victims into zombies and fills up the basement with them. No, no, really. And this is all in ONE movie, not a triple feature. Monogram REALLY gave you your ticket price's worth, didn't they? See why we're not celebrating PRC Week, Balconeers?

A couple of other fun things to look for... as usual with Monogram Pictures, there's a movie theatre as part of the city set, and you'll not only see posters and lobby cards for Mr. Wise Guy with the East Side Kids, but as Dave O'Brien is looking for Bela Lugosi, he casually strolls right past a poster for The Corpse Vanishes with -- Bela Lugosi! Also, most hidden stairways or secret rooms have fancy-schmantzy hidden buttons to trigger the door mechanism. Not Lugosi's battery of secret doorways, nosireebob. You open the secret doorways by -- (now get this) -- pulling the chain on the light switch. Yep, that's all there is to it. No detective or police officer entering a room would EVER think to turn on the LIGHT, now, would he?

This is a terrific, fun picture, perfect late-night fodder, and a beautiful start to the BelaBration 2008! Join us here EVERY night Feb. 11-17 for more Monogram fun!